Self Pity or Pride ?

I enjoy interviewing…they always teach me something new about the complicated Homo sapiens.

Here I am interviewing Ani for a position in my team. After all the regular questioning, I noticed his GATE percentile.  GATE is an all India exam which provides you a gateway to premier colleges for post graduation in engineering. And when I double checked his resume, I did not find a post graduation. Naturally, I wanted to know why? Getting a score and a good one as it was is not a small feat! And, why did he not take it up? This question came up almost at the flag end of the interview, by when I had already signed up on taking him in.

What followed opened my eyes to a new dimension! Ani comes from a background where his finances did not support his study expenses. In fact he had to discontinue a year now and then giving in to his financial stature. He owes a lot to the people of his town who considering his marks paid for his fees! He never let them down by grabbing the opportunity and excelling in his education.  So, after giving GATE although he did score, he realized the fees were something he could not bear and hence opted for a salaried job instead.

So far, this could appear like a story one could have heard. Given the demographics, social stature and financial disparity the Unity in Diversity country hosts, backgrounds like this are quite possible.

But, what made me sit back and think is the way Ani handled his background. Given a situation to cash on, I have met many a people who use self pity and draw my attention. I have met many who use you for their advantage just by casting themselves as victims of circumstances. Before you realize what they have set you up for, you are way into their story! And here was a guy who never for once talked about his testing times. Here was a guy who never felt embarrassment in sharing his roots! Here was a guy who took pride in where he came from and what did with it. To me, I knew at that moment, I met the right person. It does not matter what or how our circumstances have been….what matters is whether you want to draw self pity or pride….what matters is how do you use them to bounce back stronger!!!